Hello my sweet friends!!
Man, what a season it has been and I’m oh so happy to be here to tell you all about it. I was feeling a little dazed and confused after my wild journey of treatment. It sure isn’t over yet but I feel as if I am safe to move on little bits at a time. When I was undergoing the worst of it in the hospital I would have visions of going back to camp. It seemed like a dream with the state I was in but I chose to hope. This led me back to A Place Called Home.
I just finished serving for my fourth summer at Shepherd’s Fold Ranch as the Camp Manager. Practically it looked like pouring out to the place I love while going to treatment in Oklahoma City every three weeks. Spiritually it looked like a safe place for me to heal physically and emotionally. You see, camp is a bubble outside of the real world. When you go and serve for a whole summer at the Fold you are taken away to the lush green trees, sweaty afternoons, and lots of laughter with some of your closest friends. It is as if you are granted permission to forget the troubles that would like to follow everywhere you go and spend a season in growth and development. I knew my healing would come from sun honey and heart fill ups not appointments and stale doctors.
Simply put: I escaped.
However, that season has come to an end as of Friday. Now I am back on my tip toes overlooking the cliff of all my endless possibilities. Sometimes my logic starts to voice it’s complains about not having a structured plan with concrete ideas. But most of the time I just feel the buzz of my dreams getting excited about the possibility of coming to fulfillment.
I am staying in Tulsa due to my obligation to finish out my targeted therapy treatment in OKC. So this is my fresh start and the surface of it looks like just a lot of adult responsibilities (in search of a house, car, and job hahaha wow how fun). But beneath the surface there are these little glimpses of big “what ifs.” Sometimes I keep those safely tucked away in a chest labeled “Need to Pray” and other times I share them with my close friends to gain some inspiration.
I think it is both fun and terrifying to open my chest of “what ifs” to the world. But hey, who knows? Maybe one will catch a fire and burn for the revival I desperately want to see in my surroundings now. So here is to making my dreams a reality. One step at a time. Enjoying the process. Feeling the push of growth. Heart seeking Heaven’s invasion. Eyes always looking up.
Hey Jesus, this one is on you.
There is more to come.